Tonight I feel like I’m writing this post for my brother. Which is funny as I don’t think he ever reads this. But his wife does. I often forget that she does but know in the back of my kind I’ve got a loyal supporter. It’s funny as I wonder if she’s gotten my patterns and thought trauma figured out. I write something and she goes “ruh-Rob, she’s heading down that path of narcissism disguised as empathy again.” (I really hope that is not a path I take- is it does txt me)
Today I have been thinking about planning. What to do. What steps make sense for achieving this goal further down the line. I’m beginning to plan and set things in place so Im not in a “ooooooh fuck” situation. Or when I am as there are always going to be some aspect of the O.F. In life I’m using fewer o’s.
im getting to know my patterns and setting up my life in a way that works with my patterns the good the bad and the ugly.
This is basically me saying I paid bills got an order finished and have gotten further with business things and where I will put money from that.
So this is why this post is to my brother tonight. I am beginning to think and plan medium term. It is a big shift for me as I’ve been an immediate thinker for so long- a veruca salt if you will.
wirh this being said I’m going back to immediate thoughts as it is bedtime.