It is 4:46 and I’m blogging early so my eyes aren’t crossed and I’m not about to start snoring mid thumb-type... (yes, somehow it seems the fates have decided that authenticity means mobile device bkogging). Or I just use it as a lazy excuse for my atrocious grammar. I’m actually a fairly decent speller, so the horrific spellings are often a case it said sleepiness and an inability to correct it— if I stop I will be asleep. 

i have been on new anxiety meds for a week. And I think I’m really liking them. My chest doesn’t feel constricted and I don’t feel like I have to talk myself into everything. Or just feel so overwhelmed that inactivity - vibrating in place— is the only option. But the shitty thing is I’ve had a persistent headache. It varies in degrees but has been not good.  

perhaps it’s the pollen, perhaps the scent in shampoo, perhaps the meds, perhaps dehydration, perhaps the moon, perhaps those pesky gnomes laughing at me. Anyway, it’s been not fun as I can’t be as productive. I have just needed sleep and been a bit distracted bc of the pressure behind my eyes. I have been thing a long sleeve shirt around my head as the pressure helps. 

blah blah blah, I’m telling you all of my personal info. 170lb 5’7” 35 Pisces born on the 10th. All of this info— the former not the latter, or perhaps it is the latter—Lose 10 # and cut your hair?!???  Has been making me a bad blogger. As I am trying new practices in life. And it’s hard to clarify or even translate what I’m trying to do. *sigh* and my headaches have been making it a bit harder. Especially as a recovering addict I am so wary of trying to self prescribe. I don’t know what I can take or should take and sadly my instinct is to dope myself until I don’t feel.

So I am feeling lots of change and just an immense amount of tiredness. So... I have been productive and may take a nap and go to a meeting.


Christina Osheim