I am facing the persnickety problem of late night (hahahaha, to think I have reached the day when 9:15 feels late. 🤦‍♀️...) blogging is that I am tired.  

The end of the day for me seems to close with a grief spell. Sadness that though I was busy and doing good work with moments of joy I did not do it all. 

i went to a meeting and the topic was grief and handling it. And I had that, duh, that’s what I’ve been going through for a while. Different stages of grief. I could surmise what it is and make up plausible stories. But I think I have an idea that I have a handful of things that are all going forward, but not at my speed. My grief is accepting that I am not in control of how it all turns out.  

And that I haven’t had time to make. That’s the killer. And to make in a rhythm I need to get studio heat figured out, and world hunger and and and... 

it’s not bad though. I am living my dream. And I am adapting to do what I need to do to be me. To thrive. Everything that is up in the air is up in good air. Positive air. I just can’t xontrol gravity. Hahaha. Acceptance is a bitch.

g. My beloved resident is making so much progress. I get so much light and joy and happiness seeing him progress. We read and talked and held hands and I introduced him to the good place as I thought he might enjoy the philosophical bent to it. And he did! I asked him after episode 1 if he liked it and he responded yep without thinking! It is truly remarkable. He is one of my people. I sat with him watching the show on my iPad, holding his hand snuggled close. My head on his shoulder and his head resting atop mine. It was so healing. I also did the full moon ritual with him. I cannot wait to see what happens. Or rather let me rephrase, I can wait for HP to show me what will happen.

im thinking maybe I’ll get Brit box and watch the vicar of dibley. I think that would be really nice for tonight.  

 

Peace out.  

 

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Christina Osheim