I have one of the kindest fathers in the world. That is truly a blessing. I went over to my parents for turkey tonight and it was nice. Somehow toward the end conversation steered towards thankfulness, not surprising, and it kinda slipped out of my mouth that right now I’m not a fan of thanksgiving and celebrating it makes me feel like I’m enabling a lot of bad things this country has done. 

My mom (her face alarmed/aghast): But it’s my favorite holiday.  

(I now feel like I have been naughty and put coal in stockings instead of candy) 

me: I’ll celebrate it with you (eat dinner) but I don’t think I’ll celebrate it myself if it were me alone. 

(Both parents look at me like I’m an alien) 

So, inevitably the conversation touches on the horrific way native Americans have been treated, Lincoln’s federalizing the holiday to unite the north and south (hahahaha, that’s gone well... 🤦‍♀️) white Caucasian men and their greed and by the end my poppa was saying 

“my radicalized daughter” kinda proud but kinda sad that I’m not happy with Caucasian men leading this country- probably that he is responsible, which he is and isn’t, personally and politically no, but by birth, yes. Same as me for being s Caucasian female. 

and my mom looking proud, her eyes shining that I was taking a stand for radical inclusivity.  

It was actually a really nice time as I do love my parents very dearly and so happy we can celebrate as a family and talk about ideas and morality and philosophy.   

When my brother is here he and my dad get into really long discussions over dinner. It’s fasxinating. And will soon be happening! Hurrah!  

Tonight mother moon is shining down upon us spinning her mystical, magical beams to take us on a grand adventure, or start us on one, or prod us along if we’ve been lazy. I wonder where she’ll leave me.  

I packed up the rest of my work for sale and it is on its way. Mother moon will be preparing special homes for these objects.  

It is such a strange feeling I have with things like this - mailing shipments of work or putting up a show. They go into another realm that I have no place in. They mature and leave the nest. That’s really it. Where they go I do not. I have no control over their destinations or life spans.  

There is always a loneliness and a bit of heart break that happens for me. 

I could go on an on about the minutia of it all, but that unnecessary and overly sentimental. So bye-bye babies like we said bye-bye birdie after the lackluster turkey got chucked into the bin after the repast.  

All of this, including the moon has made me feel so restless. A bit more anxious than is comfortable and a lot of the fight against bad habits and regressing. No, not talking about drinking or smoking, more along the lines of take a nap and procrastinate. So I took a shower, waxed my legs “yeeeow!” Went to a meeting and got it done.  

And now time to do something else. Like perhaps sleep.  

Til Manana  

 

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Christina Osheim