Is it possible to yawn and want a nap and be really excited to work at the same time?
8 months! Today is 8 months! and 5 months for this blog! Wow. Time does fly. And for this case, cause, endeavor, life change those are the best 3 words ever. Time does fly and fly cleanly. Perhaps there have been a few rumblings and unexpected turbulence but oxygen masks have not needed to be deployed and I am NOT on cruise control but am enjoying the current I have joined. That made me think of those planes sleek planes that don't *i think?!?* have engines but use the existing air currents and pressure zones to navigate. I think that is the best metaphor for living a sober life as autopilot is not what you want to put the setting on. But moving throughout life intentionally and thoughtfully and cleanly with the natural ebb and flow of the good and bad of life is exactly how a sober lady, or any lady/man/person can endeavor to live their life and how I plan to continue living mine.
This weekend was great. I am trying to figure out how to write about it. Especially as it was not my trip alone, it was my first time going out of town with my beau and the last thing I want to do is some play by play of we went here and then there and then that other place and ate ice cream while walking on the beach at sunset listening to vivaldi and drinking alcohol free champagne and writing cheesy love messages to aliens in the sand. We did not do that. Although now that sounds really fun and I want to do just that!
I was a bit trepidatious about heading to Philly. I left Philadelphia feeling defeated. DC hadn't worked, Philly hadn't worked, I was at a loss for what to do with my life art/career wise, spiraling down into alcohol abuse and feeling crippled. I was afraid that heading back to the city I would feel triggered by memories of stupid things I did, old favorite haunts, the feelings of hopelessness and dread I left Philly shrouded with. That didn't happen! I felt like I reclaimed Philadelphia again. Or reacquainted myself with the city. That being said I did not go into S. Philly which is where I was living when I began to spiral. It was a fabulous trip. We had fun together and great times staying with my friends and now have matching sunburns, although my lobster is redder than his lobster.
It is nice to be back. I am tired from all of the driving and walking around and feeling like it is time to begin to put all of my plans into action. Time to studio!!!! As my next scheduled event is July 8th I have 2 weeks of unscheduled time to studio to my hearts content. So, forget alcohol free champagne and sand, I am drinking tonic and throwing love pots for aliens!!!